The Queen of Screen Blog

Latest Update

2011-08-22T12:51:00.004-05:00

I hesitate to post this update with Mercury in retrograde (may need to post a reversal next week), but here goes anyway.

This spring and early summer the TV project was moving forward nicely. There were lots of hours spent on a pitch, followed by some BIG meetings in L.A. But, alas, we now appear to be stuck in development hell once again.

I need to really get my act together and finish the first draft of my feature screenplay. I started over fresh back in Feb/March, right before I went to the John Truby story seminar in L.A. (Two thumbs up!) I've only got another 10-20 pages to write...but then the REAL work begins: the Rewrites.

Status Update

2011-02-12T13:37:00.003-06:00

Hello All, long time no talk! I recently got back from a month in Hawaii (trying not to rub it in, but it's hard). Still going through Mainland readjustment/Hawaii withdrawal. In fact, if the wind changes tomorrow, I might pack my things and head back.

Anyhow, when I got back from Hawaii, I thought to myself "Now what?" A string of guilt trip thoughts started bombarding me once again, like "I should be doing something meaningful/productive." But then I heard the words of Byron Katie: "Is that true?" (Just went to one of her workshops :-) )

Anyway, I do want to get back on track and finish my screenplay. I still have a Canadian production company interested in turning my book into a movie, plus I have my new friend Bob Cohen in NYC who wants to turn it into a TV show (he's in the process of pitching it right now!) These are opportunities that people dream and wait their whole lives for. So, to get out of my stuck place, I'm thinking about doing another screenwriting workshop in L.A. next month. Either that or I need to do something to really clear out my throat chakra. I took voice lessons last summer and that seemed to work. If anybody has any other suggestions, pls let me know. I love New Age therapies, and, as you can tell, I'm a workshop junkie.

Many thanks,
Ellen

An Exciting Turn of Events

2010-11-29T00:12:00.003-06:00

Hello All, while I'm still working on the movie screenplay, there's been an exciting turn of events on the TV side!

Posted: Wed., Nov. 24, 2010, 4:00am PT

Airline comedy in the works
Bob Cohen options 'Dysfunctional Flight Attendant'

By Michael Schneider

As thousands of Americans take to the skies this weekend -- after being subjected to those controversial security checks -- TV vet Bob Cohen sees a comedy there.
Cohen, whose resume spans from PBS and KTLA to Barris Industries and Palladium Entertainment, has optioned the rights to the novel in blog format "Diary of a Dysfunctional Flight Attendant" to turn into a scripted series.

The book, penned by Ellen Simonetti, takes a look at the humorous and surreal world of the pilots, flight attendants and crew that make up the airline industry.

Read the rest of the article on Variety.com

Long Time No Post

2010-11-09T22:54:00.002-06:00

Hi All, it's been a while, I know. A lot has happened. My computer crashed back in Sept, then I went to San Diego for a week for a great energy medicine workshop (intending to work on my screenplay while I was out there--that didn't happen), then I came back and had my dear friend Gina visiting me from Costa Rica, and now it's already time to gear up for the holidays, and I'm doing a lot of travel this holiday season :)

Meanwhile, I've finally picked up and reread Act I of my screenplay, and of course I hate it! So, I'm rewriting it...at least the beginning. I think what I wrote before was only amusing to airline people.

Anyhow, people keep asking me about my case with my former employer. All I can say is the matter is resolved. I'd like to thank my lawyers, Kevin Fitzpatrick in Atlanta, and Gary Bledsoe and Walter Muse in Austin, for a GREAT job!!!

Now back to writing this durned screenplay...believe it or not, Ricky Martin, my gay boyfriend, has given me a lot of inspiration this week! ;-)

First Snippet!

2010-08-11T18:20:00.011-05:00

Hello All, I've actually finished the first draft of Act I already! I've submitted it to the production company for review. I told them it flowed so fast, I must have either done something really right or horribly wrong!

In honor of Steven Slater, the JetBlue flight attendant who made a saucy exit the other day--Good for him!--here's a scene from my screenplay of kind of the reverse scenario. A passenger has (almost) had enough! (Of course, all flight attendants know the passenger-abusing-flight attendant scenario is more the norm!)

(FYI, VO = Voice Over. This is the blog narration.)

[scrippet]
INT. AIRPLANE - FIRST CLASS CABIN - NIGHT

ELENA (VO)
Queen of Sky just wasn't on the ball last night. I was working first class on the way to Buenos Aires, and it didn't start off well.

Elena helps a boarding PASSENGER stow her ridiculously oversized SUITCASE in the overhead bin. Elena loses her grip and drops it on a middle-aged frequent flyer in a business suit, Mr. Souffrant (the same man she collided with in the first scene), seated on the aisle.

ELENA
I'm sooo sorry, sir.

MR SOUFFRANT
(politely)
Don't worry about it. I'm fine.

LATER

ELENA (VO)
Then I spilled a drink-OK, two drinks-on another guy. I'm such a klutz! We were still at the gate.
Elena carries a coffee and bloody mary on her small metal tray. She trips and spills them both on Mr. Souffrant.

ELENA
(throwing a stack of cocktail napkins on the spill)
I'm so sorry, sir! Let me get you a cleaning voucher.

MR SOUFFRANT
(still polite, with a feigned smile)
That's OK, don't worry about it. Just get me some seltzer and a towel.

LATER

ELENA (VO)
Thankfully, things went better in flight.

Elena lounges on the first class jumpseat reading a PEOPLE MAGAZINE as Mr. Souffrant repeatedly rings his call bell trying to get rid of his meal tray. Ricky struts up from coach and Mr. Souffrant tries to hand him his tray.

RICKY
(with a dismissive flip of the hand)
I'm sorry, sir. Is not my cabin!

Ricky continues to the front of the plane and joins Elena on the first class jumpseat. They start chatting.

RICKY
These passengers are so high maintenance.

ELENA
Tell me about it! I'm working first class, remember?

RICKY
Oh, hey girl, did you make the crew juice?

ELENA
Not yet. Thanks for reminding me.

Elena gets up and disappears behind the galley curtain where she starts making a toxic-looking concoction of red wine, champagne, different minis from the liquor kit, Sprite, and a splash of orange juice. She mixes it in three empty Evian bottles.

EXT. AIRPORT ARRIVALS AREA - MORNING

ELENA (VO)
Anyway, all that matters is we got to Buenos Aires in one piece.

The NINE-MEMBER CREW climbs onto their hotel van and Elena starts passing around cups of sangria.

ELENA (VO)
(continuing)
And, most importantly, Queen of Sky has a hot date on the layover!

Their van pulls away from the terminal, splashing through a mud puddle, which drenches the much-abused Mr. Souffrant as he stands on the sidewalk waiting for his ride. His facial expression finally changes to full frustration.
[/scrippet]
OMG! What a cool app this is! Anyway, let me know what you think. Remember, this is my first draft and I'm a novice screenwriter, so PLS constructive criticism only!

Note to Self: Add a Steven Slater-esque scene later in script.

Good News!

2010-07-28T13:05:00.005-05:00

I've finally written the first 3 pages of my screenplay! So that means only 87 pages to go :-) :-P

I wrote the opening sequence wherein our heroine is describing her Trip from Hell on her blog and it's portrayed through a slightly exaggerated flashback. Plan to continue with the second scene/sequence of Act I today.

I will post snippets of the screenplay when I figure out how. Constructive feedback would be greatly appreciated...especially if you're in the industry.

Queen of Sky Movie Update!

2010-07-02T22:15:00.005-05:00

Hello All, I just completed a 7+ page feature film treatment, which I've shipped off to the production company for feedback. A friend of mine recommended reading Syd Field's book, The Sreenwriter's Workbook. She was right! It was GREAT and helped a TON with my structure. My friend also suggested I make Queen of Sky's suspension the midpoint of the movie. So, below is the revised structure:

Plot Point I (Inciting Incident): Layoff Announcement at Legacy Airlines; Elena aka Queen of Sky fears she may be affected.
Pinch I (midpoint of 1st half of Act II): Queen of Sky takes fun, slightly risque pics on airplane
Midpoint: She's suspended because of the pics.
Pinch II (midpoint of 2nd half of Act II): Queen of Sky decides to give media interviews
Plot Point II: She's fired and decides to sue to get her job back.
Climax: She and her lawyers fly to Atlanta to meet with Legacy attorneys.
Resolution: I'll keep this under wraps...you'll have to wait til the movie comes out 8-)

What do you think? Like? Unlike?

And I've also written a new log line (one-line summary):

"A Bridget Jones-esque flight attendant's colorful, autobiographical blog leads to her suspension and, ultimately, her transformation."

And the film's Central Question is: "Will Elena aka Queen of Sky get out of the airline industry and find a more fulfilling career?"

I'm thinking of starting a Facebook fan page, since I've gotten SOOOO many people I don't know (most of whom I'm assuming are fans) adding me as a friend on my personal page. Lemme know what you think...

Trying to get this baby off the ground

2010-06-07T21:15:00.004-05:00

Hello people, thanks for following my blog and sorry for no updates. I am now told our project is stalled because they(the production co. and director) have had trouble finding a writer. I volunteered to start writing the script again. I had written a couple of TV episodes a while back, but now we're back to feature film, thus I'm starting pretty much from scratch, except for a brief outline I have sketched out a REALLY long time ago. So, I may need you all's input again.

Thanks in advance!

-Ellen

New Blog Update

2010-02-26T23:55:00.002-06:00

Hello All! Long time no talk!

So, no updates on the movie deal so far. This is a very slow process. I will update this blog when there is some news on that front. In the meanwhile, I've started a new blog at Healthfilled.com. It's about self-healing and energy health :-) two of my favorite topics! Check it out and let me know what you think.

Here's to your health!

Haiti Relief

2010-01-16T14:09:00.001-06:00

Hello friends,

I had a wonderful time in Hawaii, and plan to upload my photos soon. Meanwhile, I wanted to convey this email from my dearest friend Gina, who is Haitian (living normally in Costa Rica):

Dear Friends,

A number of people have asked me which aid organization I recommend.

I can really recommend the one of the haitian singer Wycleff Jean http://www.yele.org/ . he has been bringing in the past and now real effective help to the people of haiti and 100 percent of money donated goes to help . he is already there in the streets helping.
Either you can use your cell phone to text "Yele" to 501501, which will automatically donate $5 to the Yele Haiti Earthquake Fund (it will be charged to your cell phone bill), or you can visit Yele.org and click on DONATE. http://www.thenation.com/blogs/thebeat/516652/wyclef_jean_s_urgent_cry_to_save_haiti

Also there is the Dr Paul Farmer http://www.standwithhaiti.org/haiti

http://www.grassrootsonline.org/news/press-releases/grassroots-international-establishes-earthquake-emergency-relief-fund-haiti

The british organization oxfam

The red cross of course and unicef and

The catholic relief organization http://crs.org/

I am sure there are others and I shall do my best today and tomorrow to find out. In the meantime many thanks for support.

As you know my immediate family is doing well ( meaning alive) although my moms' house ( and all her neighbors') has been totally destroyed she was able to come out of it alive and with her body suffering very superficial wounds. I am in France ( for the last two months visiting family) now with my cousins who have lost family members and friends including their aunts husband who died trying to protect his 12 year old daughter who miraculously survived in good shape under two corpses and concrete debris. They are crying day and night and as you know some people have suffered much worse.

The response and the generosity of the people in the rest of the world and in France where we are now has been truly remarquable.

Lots of good wishes and thanks to you all,

Gina

Vacation Time

2009-12-09T22:37:00.002-06:00

Hello All,

I'll be lying on a beach somewhere warm and sunny for most of the rest of this month/year, but I should have an update when I get back. If not a movie update, then at least an update on the status of my suntan.

Happy Holidays!

Quickie

2009-11-22T12:43:00.004-06:00

Hi all, had a great time in San Francisco this week again. Someone asked me about my case against Delta, so I wanted to address that quickly. I haven't heard anything in a while, so I believe the case is still pending. If anybody knows anything different, please let me know! :)

Long Time No Talk

2009-11-12T18:02:00.002-06:00

Hello All, sorry for no posts lately. I've been debating whether to ditch this blog and start another blog, which I may or may not link to this one. I was kind of thinking it would be nice to sink back into cyber-anonymity.

But then I heard from my production company the other day that they've found a director for our movie. So, stay tuned. This movie-making is a slow business. Sorry about that last entry... that was my pain-body coming out again. I'm currently reading the Power of Now and have subscribed to EckhartTolleTV.com.

Just got back from a fun vacation out in the Bay Area. Went to Sonoma and Napa and SF and even visited my good friend Kata and her baby twins in San Jose. I taught her how to balance the twins' chakras. I may or may not post trip pics here.

Ciao!

My Blog Imposter on the New Journalspace

2009-08-06T15:30:00.005-05:00

Hello All,

I haven't Googled my name in a long time, but I just did and found a blog (posing as me, I suppose. I didn't read far enough) popped up first. Could someone please tell me how to fix this? queenofsky.journalspace.com is NO LONGER my blog! Journalspace.com crashed and then was relaunched, as you all may recall. I don't have time for this drama.

This is my ONLY blog now! (queenoscreen.com, that is. If you're reading this on FB, it's being imported as a note.)

I'm afraid to look at my Wikipedia page, but if someone could check over there for malicious crap, I'd appreciate it.

Many thanks!

-Ellen

Not Much Going On

2009-08-05T11:38:00.002-05:00

I'll try to post regularly here, even though not much to say at the moment. Making a movie is a slow process, especially in the beginning.

As for me, I'm STILL going through all my crap for my move. Am also working on yet another business idea. This one, of course, is the bomb! I'm supposed to be writing an actual business plan right now, but not quite sure how to do it. Need to read some sample business plans online.

Anyway, I'll post if anything exciting happens. Meanwhile, have a great summer! (or winter down under)

Staying Cool

2009-07-12T16:00:00.003-05:00

Hi All,

Sorry for no updates lately. What happened was when I came back from Costa Rica my perspective kind of changed. Spending 2 weeks on an organic tropical farm will do that to you. I've also been in the middle of moving recently. I haven't moved in 11 years, so there's a lot of crap to go through!

On the QueenofScreen front, I talked to the production company last week and we're changing gears from TV back to feature film. So I need to dust off my old treatment that I started working on last fall. I'd be flattered if anything was made based on my book...TV show, movie, etc. I'll pass on the porn version, though. Although, I've heard from different people that my pic is being used as girls' profile pics on various naughty sites. Don't know what to do about that.

Anyhow, so we're back to square one with the feature film idea, so pls send in your suggestions. I need to dig through my archive here and see what people said before.

My Friends in Costa Rica

2009-05-27T16:37:00.002-05:00

I helped my friends in Costa Rica set up a blog... it contains pics of their beautiful farm and info about their family camp this summer:

http://costaricacamp.blogspot.com/

Hello

2009-05-11T20:21:00.004-05:00

Hello out there,

I am not gone... I was just in Costa Rica for two weeks. Am having a little trouble adjusting back to normal life. Update soon.

-Ellen

Update

2009-04-10T16:53:00.002-05:00

Sorry for no update... not much going on except doing a lot of research (i.e. watching a lot of TV) and just finished my second script. Trying to add more conflict as per production company's request. If this script meets their approval, I'll go back and revise the pilot episode and possibly write one more episode. I've been watching a lot of Scrubs and Sex and the City. The blog narration idea has presented more problems than I anticipated. (Protagonist can't be blogging during flights.) Because these are TV and not movie scripts, I probably won't be able to post them here... although maybe I can post part of the pilot once it's approved.

L.A.

2009-03-13T21:13:00.004-05:00

Hi all,

I got back from L.A. late on Monday. It was a great trip. The Robert McKee Story seminar was truly inspiring! So, of course, I've come home and started revising my pilot script. I've postponed posting it on the web. I need to discuss that with the production company, etc. first.

Anyway, just a quick note. I had so much great Asian food out in Cali (especially Thai and Japanese!) I'm gonna miss that. I also got to catch up with some good friends out there.

A Home for My Script?

2009-03-02T22:12:00.003-06:00

OK, let me be more specific. My pilot script is 27 pages long. Does anyone know where I can host it on the web and then link to it here? I can't just cut and paste it here, and, correct me if I'm wrong, the only files you seem to be able to upload here on Blogger are pics and vids.

Off to L.A.

2009-02-27T22:25:00.002-06:00

Well, I'm off to L.A. next week for a screenwriting seminar. Very excited about that.

Meanwhile, I've almost finished my pilot script. I'm trying to figure out a way to post it, or at least parts of it here for feedback. If anyone has a suggestion, let me know. It's currently a Word doc, but I could probably figure out how to convert it to a PDF.

Many thanks!

Happy Fat Tuesday!

2009-02-24T19:31:00.003-06:00

Hello All,

So, for research purposes I rented the first season of Mile High (British show) recently. I finally got around to watching it last week and barely made it through the first episode! It's soft porn disguised as a soap opera about flight attendants. And all the flight attendants are portrayed as whores, thieves or drug dealers! Really a crap show!

Speaking of shows about flight attendants, I'm currently writing the pilot script for my show idea :) I'm really excited about it. My screenwriting class really got me motivated to finally do it. And next week I'm off to L.A. to an intensive screenwriting seminar. Fun times!

Hope you all catch a lot of beads tonight and hope you don't wake up in a pool of your own fluids tomorrow!

Hasta!

Back in Business!

2009-02-18T23:47:00.006-06:00

Sorry for the blog lag, guys. I have been meaning to post, but for some reason never got around to it.

In my screenwriting class the other day we were working on log lines (1-3 line film synopses). In my eagerness to be concise I sacrificed comprehension:

In search of balance, a self-described "dysfunctional" flight attendant starts a blog that ends up throwing her life into complete disarray.

The other students (and teacher) didn't understand my concept. Let me know if you think this is better:

A flight attendant starts a light-hearted blog to navigate her "dysfunctional" life. When her employer discovers it, however, her whole world is turned upside down.

I appreciate your feedback, as it's really hard to find the plot of your own life :-O

The "25 things about me" chain-letter

2009-01-27T21:01:00.002-06:00

This chain letter has been going around Facebook. I've gotten it twice now. You're supposed to write 25 things about yourself and then "tag" 25 of your friends so they will follow suit...

1.) I am developing a TV dramedy about flight attendants. (Say it with confidence!)

2.) The above line is what I will now be saying when somebody asks me at a party, "What do YOU do?"

3.) I got together with 3 girlfriends last night and wrote New Moon affirmations. We also drank wine and ate quesadillas.

4.) I do a lot of yoga, specifically Dahn Yoga, a kind of Korean yoga. I swear by it.

5.) I've started reading a lot of spiritual books lately. A New Earth changed my life.

6.) I'm currently reading Spiritual Liberation, The EFT Handbook, and A History of Last Night's Dream.

7.) I decided not to enroll in Univ. of Texas this semester because I'm 34 years old and don't need to be graded. I didn't need to be graded at 16 either, which is one of the reasons I dropped out of high school.

8.) Instead of university classes, this winter/spring I'm taking non-credit classes and seminars on screenwriting, which I will probably get more out of anyway.

9.) In March I'm going to an intensive 3-day screenwriting seminar in L.A.

10.) Looking forward to the trip to L.A. to visit some good friends.

11.) I've been working on a press release today about my TV show project. We've signed on an excellent producer to develop the show!

12.) I'm dogsitting this week.

13.) We're expecting a possible "winter storm" tonight. That happens about once every 3-5 years here in Texas and the whole city shuts down.

14.) Why are relationships so complicated?

15.) I can't believe I have 10 more things to come up with for this list!

16.) The dog is on a diet because she needs to have knee surgery. It's REALLY hard to say no to her, though, when she comes begging with those big brown eyes.

17.) All of my (married) friends seem to be popping out babies all of a sudden.

18.) I am very grateful for my abundance.

19.) I don't know how I'm going to pick 25 people to tag for this out of 600+ friends!

20.) Looking forward to a trip to Costa Rica this spring and possibly a trip to Canada and Peru this summer. I miss Peru!

21.) Tomorrow is my grandma's 92nd birthday. I need to send her a card.

22.) I ate a breakfast quesadilla for lunch (with eggs and potatoes and cheese in it).

23.) I'll eat a salad for dinner. I try to eat at least one salad every day.

24.) It's supposed to be back in the 60s by this weekend.

25.) Looking forward to the next happy hour! (I don't club anymore...happy hour's more my thing.)

It's gonna be a GREAT year!

2009-01-22T13:36:00.003-06:00

Hi all,

I'm still thinking positive and focusing on my affirmations for a GREAT 2009! I'm really excited about a screenwriting seminar I just signed up for in L.A. in March. And I got a nonstop ticket to L.A. for under $200 on American--Woohoo! Flying free was great, but flying confirmed is even better!

I'm also planning a trip to Costa Rica this winter/spring to see my dear friend Gina on her organic farm. I wanted to go over the holidays, but tickets were too expensive and frequent flyer tickets were few and far between. Anywhoo, I am feeling so positive about things right now. I just wish the rest of the world felt as positive as I do right now.

I just bought a few really interesting books, too: Spiritual Liberation by Michael Bernard Beckwith, The History of Last Night's Dream by Roger Kamenetz, and The EFT Manual by Gary Craig. I'm a slow reader, so it'll take me a while to get through them, but they are really good. EFT=Emotional Freedom Technique, a kind of tapping/acupressure technique to let go of negative emotions. I'm practicing that while reading my affirmations. If you search "EFT" on YouTube you'll find plenty of info on it...from how to get over PTSD to how to attract more abundance into your life. Good stuff!

Anyway, off to run errands...Blessings!

-Ellen

Casting Suggestions?

2009-01-12T00:30:00.003-06:00

Hey, does anyone have any suggestions for casting for a TV series about flight attendants? I'm drawing a blank on this. Casting ideas for a movie seemed much easier. We need a multiracial cast with at least one gay Latin guy :-D Oh, and I almost forgot...must love people and love to travel!

Thanx!

Prepared for departure and cross checked,

-Ellen

Down Time

2009-01-07T23:53:00.003-06:00

Well, I have 2 more weeks until school starts, so I'm using the time to get my life in order...fixing car, spring cleaning, clutter clearing, watching a lot of Oprah, etc. Therefore, nothing exciting to report at the moment. Tomorrow I get my overdue annual vajajay exam. Oh, joy! Then I need to get new tires and back up the files on my laptop. (Don't wanna pull a "JS"--see previous entry.) Fun, fun, fun!

If I have something more exciting to report I'll let you know.

Peace out!

Out with the Old, In with the New

2009-01-02T18:25:00.003-06:00

Happy New Year, All!

Well, the New Year has already released me of some old baggage...my original blog at Journalspace.com was lost when their servers crashed and the site decided to pull the plug. The good news is not all is lost, as I had been reposting my blog entries on MySpace for at least a year. In any case, could somebody please update my Wikipedia page to reflect that this is my ONLY blog now? Thanx!

I hope 2009 brings you all your hopes and desires. My resolution was originally not to make a resolution, but instead to write New Year's Affirmations. Well, I did that and I decided as an afterthought that my resolution should be to be positive this year. So if you catch me being negative on my blog (including about certain airlines that fire people because of their blogs and Facebook groups), please stop me.

The consensus on my TV pilot seems to be that non-airline peeps don't find the third act funny, so I'll have to punch it up a bit. Thanks again for all you comments...I look forward to many more in this new year!

-Ellen

"Queen of Sky" TV Pitch

2008-12-23T18:50:00.004-06:00

Hello, All!

Happy Holidays!

For my holiday gift this year, could you please check out my TV pitch below and let me know what you think ...or if you have suggestions, even better!

Queen of Sky TV Series

Hook: An attractive new-hire flight attendant blogs her way through the ups and downs of her “glamorous” new lifestyle, including a string of dysfunctional relationships. (or Ally McBeal on a plane!)

Concept: Queen of Sky is a 30-minute dramedy about a new-hire flight attendant, Elena, who uses her blog to sort through her crazy life. The tone will be like Sex and the City or Ally McBeal with the occasional Scrubs-style fantasy. For example, when Elena does the safety demo for the first time, she imagines herself on a stage in the spotlight with her theme song playing. Elena has two new-hire roommates, a flamboyant Latin male and a Puerto Rican (or other ethnicity) princess. They start off in a “crash pad” for the first few episodes, but eventually share a one-bedroom apartment in Queens (halfway between LaGuardia and JFK). At the end of the pilot episode, Elena starts her blog and blog narration kicks in. The concept is based on my career-ending blog-turned-book, entitled Diary of a Dysfunctional Flight Attendant. My screen name on the blog was “Queen of Sky” and the blog was mostly written in third person. Elena, like me, is a Spanish-speaking gringa. Her Spanish is just good enough to qualify her as a language speaker and bad enough to cause a lot of misunderstandings and jumblings of the onboard announcements. She flies a mixture of international and domestic trips, but mostly to Latin America and Spain. Occasionally she gets to fly with one or both of her roommates, but normally she’s flying with catty, miserable women who are old enough to be her mother. Audiences will tune in each week to see where Elena will go next, what adventures she will have along the way, and whether she will ever manage to find a boyfriend that treats her with respect and doesn’t mind her being gone at least fifty percent of the time!

Central Conflict: The main conflict of the show is Elena’s continuous struggle to find balance in her life—particularly between her new job and her dysfunctional love life. She would really like a stable, functional relationship, but only seems to attract the opposite. Also, being a new-hire, she flies most weekends and holidays and often has to sit “reserve” (on-call duty), so she never knows where she’ll be next. Episodic conflicts include Elena’s constant conflicts with passengers, her roomies, coworkers, and Legacy Airlines management. For example, Elena and Ivette sometimes fight over their gay husband, Ricky, and Ricky sometimes brings home guys to their one-bedroom apartment without warning them in advance. And, of course, Elena is always getting into it with crazy/obnoxious passengers and coworkers. These conflicts will sometimes span several episodes.

Audience Demographics: 18- to 39-year-old females of all races; middle-aged white men who want to know what flight attendants are thinking; and gays and lesbians of all ages, races and classes. Two of the core cast are Latinos/ethnic and one is gay. There will be other recurring cast and guest stars of different races and sexual orientations.

TV Pilot Outline

2008-12-17T21:15:00.003-06:00

OK, so the show is basically gonna be "Ally McBeal on a Plane" to put it in TV lingo. It's a half-hour dramedy (no laugh track). I'd appreciate some feedback on this, thanks in advance!
The core cast is small, because it's hard to follow a bunch of flight attendants around on their trips, and also because our main character will be a point of view character. We'll have a lot of celebrity guest stars as both flight attendants and passengers, though (think: Britney Spears as a flight attendant!) The core cast consists of:

• Elena aka “Queen of Sky” (lead/POV/narrator) She’s a cross between Carrie Bradshaw and Ally McBeal who speaks just enough Spanish to qualify as a Spanish speaker at Legacy Airlines. I'm picturing someone like Alicia Silverstone.

• Ricky, Latin flamer/party boy—He’s so hilarious he can get away with murder, like joining the Mile High Club with a random passenger while he’s working the flight!

• Ivette, Caribbean diva/party girl—likes to tease nerdy frequent flyers and use them to buy her stuff. Later she becomes a “cockpit queen” (always in the cockpit flirting with the pilots).

Queen of Sky Pilot Episode Breakdown

Teaser: The show begins in the middle of an airplane evacuation. When the camera zooms out, we see it’s actually a simulator in a training facility. Our heroine, Elena, is the last one off and she trips and falls down the slide face first.

Title sequence and theme song.

ACT 1

• Final Exam at flight attendant school—we hear Elena reading the questions aloud in her mind: “What’s the city code for Spokane, Washington?” “How many fire extinguishers are on a 757 and where are they located?”

• The uptight trainer announces everyone passed the final except Tony. (“And for future reference, Tony, PBE does not stand for ‘Pleasurable Balls Encounter’—it’s ‘Protective Breathing Equipment!’”) Tony is escorted off the premises, making a dramatic exit. (“I’ll be back!”) Ricky blows him a kiss.

• Graduation ceremony. The recruits receive their wings, donning their uniforms for the first time, then the trainer announces Base City assignments are posted in the hall.

• Scene of hysteria as most find out they got the dreaded New York base. Elena imagines her boyfriend back in Miami distraught. Elena, Ricky and Ivette decide to catch the first flight to NY to beat the rush.

• Onboard the flight to NY, Elena calls her boyfriend in Miami to tell him the bad news. He acts disappointed, but is actually thrilled. Ricky and Ivette tell her they both dumped their boyfriends when they got invited to flight attendant training and recommend that Elena do the same.

ACT 2

• The flight attendant offers them on ground cocktails—doubles!—(“You’re gonna need these…”) and some advice. Ricky asks her if she knows of any available crash pads in NY. She says she’ll ask Wanda in the back.

• Wanda, a motherly black lady, says there are three spots open in her crash pad, but she can only take them temporarily since they’re new hires. Their conversation is cut short when Wanda has to arm her doors for departure.

• At the crash pad (a two-bedroom apartment with eight bunk beds in Kew Gardens, Queens) Wanda gives the three of them the house rules.

• A grouchy “senior mama” complains about allowing new hires at the crash pad. (“They’re gonna be here all the time!”)

• Elena wakes up to a 4am call from scheduling: “We’ve got your first assignment for you!”

ACT 3

• Elena walks onto plane rubbing her eyes and yawning. The crew asks if she’s the reserve replacing Julie. She responds, “Whatever you say—this is my first trip.”

• She sits on the jumpseat with Bonnie, an outspoken bisexual Asian chick a la Margaret Cho. Bonnie explains that airline passengers check their decency and humanity at the aircraft door. She also tells Elena all about her love life (she has a boyfriend and a girlfriend). Elena is shocked.

• After takeoff, a man goes into the lav next to their jumpseat with a thick newspaper in his hand. Bonnie says, “See what I mean?!”

• Then, during the beverage service, a passenger yells at Elena for not having his drink choice (hot chocolate). Bonnie nods at her as if to say “I told you so.”

• Then, as they’re picking up, a passenger lowers his seatback abruptly, causing the passenger behind him to hit him over the head. Bonnie nods to Elena again, knowingly.

• Montage of three more FULL flights with city codes captions (ex. ORD-MSP). We see Elena and Bonnie pushing the beverage cart up and down the aisle in a seemingly endless loop.

• Last leg, video equipment breaks and they have to do the safety “dance.” As Elena does the demo, she imagines herself on a stage with the spotlight on her and her theme song playing.

• Elena returns to the crash pad late at night to find only one snoring flight attendant with eye mask and ear plugs in place. She can’t get a hold of any of her friends to debrief, so she starts a blog (“The Queen of Sky’s Life of Glamour”) to recount her first crazy day on the job. “I’m already wondering what I’ve gotten myself into…I mean, really, I thought this was supposed to be a glamorous job!” Fade out.

*****************
Any thoughts? Rereading this, I think I need to adjust the Act breaks. I believe the rule is "your characters can only sleep on the commercial break."

Christmas Shopping

2008-12-16T23:23:00.003-06:00

Hello All,

I was in Target today doing some Christmas shopping (mostly for myself!) and was shocked to notice a certain pre-packaged gift item on the shelf. It was the "Rim it" cocktail kit, including three colors of rim sugar for martini glasses and three flourescent-colored cocktail mixers. In other words, it was a rainbow-colored collection of vials with a dish in the middle that proclaimed "Rim it!"

Does anyone else see the crude double entendre here, or have I been hanging out with too many gay guys? I was going to take a pic, but someone else did it for me:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/kcaroline/3044256995/in/photostream/

Anyway, stay tuned for updates on my TV pitch. I've finished it and am debating whether to post parts of it here. Maybe I will even post the plot outline of the pilot... need to think about it.

Ciao!

TV Hook

2008-12-09T23:05:00.003-06:00

I finally finished school last week, except for one final on Saturday, and had a little too much fun this weekend, so I'm just now getting to my TV pitch. What do you all think of this for the hook:

An attractive new-hire flight attendant blogs her way through the ups and downs of her “glamorous” new lifestyle, including a string of dysfunctional relationships.

P.S. I wanna give a shout out to my virtual now ex-husband, John, who married me on Facebook by accident today for 2 hrs and 23 minutes (apparently his real wife is also named Ellen)

Holiday Blessings and Sadness

2008-12-01T23:12:00.005-06:00

Hi All,

I made it back in one piece the other day. Had to stuff all my crap into one carry-on bag, like back in my flight attendant days, since AA is charging $15 each way to check a bag. That meant I had to put all my toiletries in little bottles in Ziploc bags. What a pain in the butt! Anywho, I managed and had a good trip home.

No, I didn't pop out a baby while I was away, although I certainly felt like I could have after all I ate last week!

I actually got to visit my Astro Twin who moved to NC (my home state) last year. You may remember that I met her through MySpace after seeing on her profile that we had the exact same birthday. That is her 3-month-old cutie pie.

Apparently a lot of big girls were born on our birthday!
(BTW, the hairspray didn't make the cut into the carry-on bag.)

While I was enjoying a deep-fried turkey on Wed.with my friends and then a vegan buffet on Thurs. with my family, unfortunately things were not so happy and prosperous over on the other side of the world. I'd like to send my condolences to the people of Mumbai and India. A good friend of mine lost a close friend in the attacks. My heart goes out to all those affected.

Blessings,

"Queen of Screen"

Happy Turkey Day!

2008-11-24T19:13:00.003-06:00

Hello All, I'm off to the East Coast tomorrow (on AA).... not looking forward to the packed flights.
Thanks to my Wikipedia fairies for changing that stuff for me. I've been criticized in the past for changing stuff myself, which seems odd since I AM after all kind of an expert on my own life.

Anywho, I leave you with this...

(I heard my family may be doing a vegetarian Thanksgiving this year.)

Help With Wikipedia

2008-11-21T23:09:00.005-06:00

***********UPDATE: Somebody already fixed it, thanks! (Not sure why they put the DeltaDocket website instead of my claim, though.) Could someone perhaps point out that that Law.com article is wrong?**********

People, I rarely visit my Wikipedia page, but I was just made aware that someone has been tampering with it again. The Law.com article is WRONG. My case was NOT dismissed. Delta filed bankruptcy a week after I filed the suit, so the suit went into bankruptcy court. Here's the proof that Wikipedia needs (my bankruptcy claim):

http://chapter11.epiqsystems.com/claimpdf/50f35f04a4054ce98ea08b27e34199f90000005035.PDF

Could someone please edit my Wikipedia page for me? I don't have the patience. We offered to settle with Delta for a reasonable amount a few months back, but got no response. That's the latest.

Two more weeks to go...

2008-11-18T19:15:00.004-06:00

Yes, just two more weeks of school... two more tests, two more papers and one final. I'll be dedicating myself to writing this screenplay and TV show pitch after the semester ends. (Production Co. has asked me to write a TV show pitch as well.) TV show pitch sounds easy, but it's not... have to figure out a cast of characters, character arcs, plot line arcs, themes, style, narration/voice, etc. Trying to figure out where to begin is once again the hardest part. So here's another question for you:

Would you like to watch a show about a.) flight attendant new hires who eventually become jaded (like the interns in Grey's Anatomy) or b.) already jaded flight attendants who give the occasional new hire a hard time?

They've asked me to do a Sex and the City-type show about flight attendants. I'm a (latecomer) fan of Scrubs, so would like to add the fantasy element (like flight attendants getting revenge on obnoxious passengers) and also am considering using blog narration.

Any thoughts?

My Short-Lived Career as a Fox News Aviation Pundit

2008-11-13T23:09:00.006-06:00

I just saw good ole Bill on The Daily Show and it reminded me of my one and only visit to the "No Spin Zone" last year :-D In case you all missed it... (BTW, I had absolutely no idea in advance what kind of questions he would ask me)

I sent Bill a copy of my book afterward inscribed "To Papa Bear from Queen of Sky". I wonder if he ever got it :'( In any case, in my movie and/or TV series I plan to answer Bill's question, which has haunted me ever since:

"Why would anyone do that kind of work for $30,000 a year?!"

"In your satin tights, fighting for your rights..."

2008-11-09T16:08:00.007-06:00

Can you guess what TV theme song those lyrics come from?

Wonder Woman, one of my favorite shows as a kid!

I'm working on a paper right now for my Narrative Strategies class in which we have to choose a TV theme song and analyze it. Guess which one I chose?

Unfortunately, now I can't get that dang song out of my head--LOL! :-P

Wonder Woman, Wonder Woman.
All the world's waiting for you,
and the power you possess.

In your satin tights,
Fighting for your rights
And the old Red, White and Blue.

Wonder Woman, Wonder Woman.
Now the world is ready for you,
and the wonders you can do.

Make a hawk a dove,
Stop a war with love,
Make a liar tell the truth.

Wonder Woman,
Get us out from under, Wonder Woman.
All our hopes are pinned on you.
And the magic that you do.

Stop a bullet cold,
Make the Axis fall,
Change their minds, and change the world.

Wonder Woman, Wonder Woman.
You're a wonder, Wonder Woman.

P.S. If you are on Facebook, pls stand up for free speech and help get those 13 Virgin flight attendants reinstated by joining my group:

VIRGIN ATLANTIC: REINSTATE THE "FACEBOOK 13"!!!

Hope and Solidarity

2008-11-05T23:53:00.004-06:00

Hello all... such a happy day today! Congratulations President-Elect Obama!

Anyhow, in solidarity with the "Facebook 13" (who were fired from Virgin Atlantic for referring to some of their passengers as "chavs"--the UK equivalent to white trash--on a Facebook group page), I've decided to post an excerpt from my book today (pages 35-36):

Flight Blog: Bogotá
Filed in FLIGHT BLOGS on Saturday, 02/05

On the way to Bogotá yesterday the Queen of Sky was working in the back of the 757 with a slightly bitchy Brazilian queen, whom we shall call Silvio. Silvio's motto regarding passengers is, "This is my house and you are my guests." (In other words, SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP!)

After the service Silvio and I were gossiping in the back galley about other flight attendants. He told me that another Brazilian guy we both knew had had a sex change operation and was now going to fly as a woman.

He had me going for a good ten minutes.

"Just kidding!" he finally squealed, getting a big kick out of himself.

Actually, I have flown with a transsexual flight attendant before. I just thought he/she was a big girl like me. It wasn't until after the trip that I heard what his/her receding hairline and fake breasts were really all about. (He/she always wore a scarf, so his/her Adam’s apple was not visible.)

The Queen of Sky is so clueless sometimes.

Anyhow, I hate the 757. I always hit my head on the video screens, and passengers always get mad at us because the overhead bins fill up within ten minutes of boarding. Especially on Latin America flights, where passengers try to bring on everything but the kitchen sink... well, sometimes that, too.

And the Queen of Sky, not being particularly empathetic, somehow is always the one who has to rip the overstuffed bag from their trembling clutches and drag it to the front door to check it.

I'll have you know I have never won any customer service awards. In fact, I am that flight attendant that you asked for a cup of water on your flight to Europe last summer…the one you’re still waiting for.

Sorry, I have a very short memory.

There have been studies about the effects of high altitude radiation on your brain wherein they have found that flying shrinks your brain.

Plus, the Queen of Sky is so tired from commuting to work at the crack of dawn the day of her trip that she cannot be bothered with your frivolous requests.

Anyhow, back to my trip. Our hotel van in Bogotá has bulletproof windows. And when we arrived at the hotel, a dog sniffed our bags for explosives. Made me feel very secure. (Not!) Actually, I’m surprised we don’t have an armed escort there, like we do in Lima.

On the way back from Bogotá today, the Queen of Sky was sitting on the so-called Sharon Stone jumpseat in the mid-galley area. The jumpseat got is name from the fact that you are facing the first row of coach passengers, and any slight movement will give those passengers a free show if you are wearing a skirt.

And of course the Queen of Sky was wearing a skirt.

In the first row, directly in front of my jumpseat, sat a redneck wearing a trucker hat that read "Alabama."

He had raised a fuss during boarding when there was no room directly over his head for his bags. I told him there was plenty of space in the back.

"You know how it is when you're tryin’ to get off," he said.

I did not like his tone.

"Oh, well," I replied unconcerned, turning back to the boarding door.

Julie, the girl working with me, was more empathetic and put his bag in first class for him.

I was going to let the bags incident slide, but then, during the flight, I caught said redneck trying to look up my skirt. I thought it was my imagination, but Silvio and Julie said they noticed it, too. Not only that, he was constantly grabbing his "goods."

Silvio said he had copped a feel of Mr. Redneck's "goods" when he passed him in the aisle on the way to the lav. He had been checking out Mr. Redneck’s goods since the beginning of the flight. I told Silvio he could have him. The Queen of Sky does not like white trash.

I was going to say something rather politically incorrect here about the reason that gringo males travel alone to South America. (In my experience, it is usually to find hookers or pick up their mail- or internet-order brides.) But then I saw said redneck in the crew and diplomat line in US Immigration, and overheard him declare to the crewmembers in front of him, “Ah’m a dip-lo-mat.”

If that is what US diplomats look and act like, I think our country is in trouble. But then again, we already are in trouble with the world community... but I'm not going to go there. This is a strictly non-political blog.

Hasta luego...
-Queen of Sky

P.S. Thanks to each of my five commenters for all of your positive words! Glad you enjoy my blog!

My Bed Buddy

2008-11-03T18:19:00.005-06:00

This was my bed buddy last week. She's quite a bed hog as you can see...

Anyway, my little furry friend has something to say to you all seeing as tomorrow's election day in these parts:

"Woof, woof, woof Obama!"

"OK, enough of that...it's sleepy time!"

A Facebook "Massacre"

2008-11-01T20:16:00.004-05:00

Hello All,

Hope you had a happy Halloween and got lots of tricks and treats last night! I woke up this morning with a doggy's rump pressed against my rump (was dog-sitting this week).

Anywho, I've been quite perturbed today about this BBC online story. If it upsets you like it did me, you can join my discussion on Richard Branson's Facebook page; send him a question on Twitter; or on his blog. My question was whether he thought "sacking" 13 crewmembers because of their Facebook posts was a smart PR move in this Web 2.0 Age.
UPDATE: Use the discussion forum on the Virgin Atlantic Facebook page. It's entitled "Reaction to the crew post today."

Well, I need to get back to studying now. I'm also working on two treatments (synopses): one for a dramedy TV series about flight attendants and one for my screenplay.

Toodle-oo!

P.S. My new Twitter name is QueenofScreen.

Happy Halloween!

2008-10-31T17:26:00.002-05:00

Trick or Treat!

Next Order of Business

2008-10-28T14:12:00.003-05:00

OK, so next up I'm gonna work on a scene outline/treatment. Then I'll actually start writing the screenplay. Hoping to have most of it done by the end of the year, but it depends on my classes. I have two papers and 5 more tests to go this semester! Luckily the semester ends Dec. 5th (but I have one final exam on the 13th).

I have a conference call scheduled with my production company on Friday. We're going to discuss TV show ideas. ("Sex and the City in the sky!") My book is easily translatable into TV, since the blog entries are very episodic. I've already spoken to other TV people about this. The problem is it's REALLY hard to get a show picked up by the networks.

The Basic Structure (Spoiler Alert!)

2008-10-26T16:24:00.006-05:00

As I described in a previous entry, the movie will start with our protagonist getting bumped off her flight home after a particularly bad 3-day trip. This causes her much frustration and incites in her the desire for change. It also leads her to start a blog. (BTW, I watched Bridget Joneses' Diary yesterday and realized that it begins very similarly to this.)

Elena (our protagonist) starts thinking about a change of path, but doesn't take action until the first turning point: Legacy Airlines announces plans to layoff several thousand flight attendants. Fearing she will be affected, Elena goes in search of another career (and ASAP!)

Act Two consists of Elena struggling to find a new career, but instead only finding dead ends and disappointments. She's relieved to find out afterward that she will, in fact, not be affected by the layoffs. In the meantime she has realized being a flight attendant isn't so bad after all. Surely all the perks are worth the occasional frustrations, right?

Also in Act Two, our heroine finds romance on a layover and starts a long distance relationship. She thinks this will work out better than dating someone back home, since she's never there anyway. I won't disclose the conclusion of this subplot.

There will be another subplot about a "Long-Suffering Frequent Flier," which will conclude here.

The second turning point will be: SURPRISE! Just when things are going smoothly, Elena is fired from her job because of her blog and decides to sue Legacy (her airline). A publicity blitz ensues (and our heroine, like Bridget Jones, is a horrendous public speaker) and then the Climax and Resolution, which I'm not gonna disclose here either.

Any thoughts?

P.S. I forgot to mention the tone of the movie will be similar to Bridget Joneses Diary (a comedy) with some Scrubs-style absurd fantasies/flashbacks.

I Voted.

2008-10-25T19:20:00.004-05:00

Hello all,

I early voted the other day at a local library. It took 5 minutes. Guess who I voted for?

I'm glad to finally get the chance to vote for the winning presidential candidate. Yes, I think Obama is gonna win by a landslide. Why? Three reasons:

High(er) minority voter turn-out
The fact that 5,000 new voters were registered on the Univ. of Texas campus the last day of voter registration alone. So, multiply that number by all the colleges and universities around the country and you'll get an idea of the number of unaccounted for (i.e. unpolled) mostly Obama voters.
Barack Obama is having his highly fortuitous "Jupiter Return" in January around inauguration time. This only happens once every 12 years, folks. Of course, my astrological predictions about the last presidential election were disappointingly inaccurate. But that's because I misjudged GW's karma (it must be past-life karma, because lord knows he didn't amass it in this lifetime!) :-P

Coming up tomorrow: the basic structure of my screenplay (spoiler alert!)

The Anti-View From the Top

2008-10-22T21:24:00.003-05:00

Hello All,

It occurred to me today that my movie will be the complete opposite of View From the Top... a sort of Anti-View From the Top, if you will. My protagonist's goal will be to get OUT of the airline industry, not into it. And she won't be a goody-goody one-dimensional character either (oh, but I forgot, Gwyneth's character was trying to rise above her trailer park upbringing--so I guess that would make her two-dimensional). I love Gwyneth Paltrow, but that movie really SUCKED! I went to see it with a few flight attendant friends when it came out back in 2003, and we were extremely disappointed (some of us more than others)! There were a few good lines and performances in it, but we could tell it wasn't written by someone in the industry (and written by a guy, at that... I mean, come on, a galley cat-fight scene--Gag!) Everybody in the industry knows that Gwyneth's airline ("Royalty", I believe) would not have lived up to her glamorous expectations and she would have been quickly corrupted.

Anywho, let me not bitch about that movie anymore. The Queen of Sky Blog is gonna be the REAL DEAL! I never thought I would get the opportunity to write a screenplay based on my book, so I'm very grateful (thanks, Hiltz Squared!) and plan on making this the best flight attendant movie EVER!!! 8-)

Margaret Cho Show

2008-10-20T21:33:00.008-05:00

I just got back from a free Margaret Cho comedy show on campus. I wish I'd thought to bring my video camera. Oh, well. Anywho, alls I can tell you is she started the show with the line, "I f%&*#@ hate Sarah Palin!" and ended it with a song, which I believe was entitled "Eat Me Out." I'd go into more detail about the show, but fear I may offend some people. It was raunchy and hilarious...at least to a bunch of college kids, myself included.

I'd like to cast Cho as a flight attendant in my movie. (And, no, she will not be portraying any of my real Asian American friends--so save the emails and phone calls, please!) What do you all think about that? Kathy Griffin is another good one, because she could be that aging flight attendant who's had a little work done and thinks nobody notices :P

P.S. After going to the Cho show, I now know more about Margaret Cho's vagina than anybody should EVER know about another person's vagina!

How It Begins

2008-10-18T18:16:00.003-05:00

I've been thinking about how the movie should start... was stuck for a while (the real reason for starting the blog doesn't work in a comedy), but I think I've finally had a breakthrough. I'm thinking it'll start with a montage of our protagonist "Elena ("Lena" for short) on the Trip from Hell. Then at the end of the trip, she rushes to the gate (the last one in the concourse, of course) for her flight home only to find that it's full (the only later flight has canceled) and her friend already has the only extra jumpseat. She tells her friend she has to get on because she's got a hot date that night. Her friend is like "See ya later, gator!"

Another friend of hers didn't get on either and she tells him, exasperated: "I've gotta get out of this business!" He replies dryly: "Don't we all." This sets up the central question: Will Elena get out of the airline business?

Elena calls and leaves a message for her date (this was their third attempt to get together for their FIRST date), then limps off to her commuter hotel, the "Crapotel." In her dilapidated room, she flips through the crappy cable channels and tries to call some of her friends to vent about her day. None of them answer. They're all flying. Meanwhile, Elena receives a text from her stood-up date telling her this was her last chance. Now more distraught, she turns to her laptop and sets up a blog, choosing "QueenofSky" as her screen name. Once she starts the blog, blog narration kicks in.

What do you all think of this beginning?

It's Illegal to be Gay in Texas (some parts, at least)

2008-10-17T11:33:00.006-05:00

Hello All,

I'm going to veer off topic today to tell you what happened to a friend of mine a while back. He was driving across Texas in a rental car and stopped at a rest stop to take a leak. Well, at this particular rest stop there were only port-a-potties, no real rest rooms. So, seeing as it was night time and dark, he decided to whiz on the side of the road. I forgot to mention that my friend is kind of obviously gay.

Well, low and behold, he was arrested for public indecency and one of the arresting cops called him all kinds of names and expletives (fag, homo, etc.) He was held overnight in jail, during which he felt suicidal because he thought he was going to lose his beloved job (he's a flight attendant.) Now, a year later, he's just managed to get his charges reduced to a misdemeanor after paying several grand in legal fees. If they hadn't reduced his charges, he would have lost his job.

Anyway, what I want to say is, if this had been a straight man, he would NOT have been arrested for taking a leak on the side of the road in small town Texas. This makes me very mad and ashamed of my state of residence (of course, our current president does, too!)

Well, that was today's soapbox. Please participate in the poll below if you haven't already. I'm going to narrow it down to 4 or 5 candidates after I've completed the screenplay and you guys have a better idea of the character.

CORRECTION: My friend says it was a "picnic area" not a rest stop, so actually there were NO restrooms, not even port-a-potties. And in this particular county at the time, the sheriff was trying to appear tough for his reelection campaign (and apparently "tough" in that part of Texas means "intolerant.")

The First Poll is Here!

2008-10-15T23:51:00.004-05:00

Note: You can write in a candidate at the bottom by choosing "Other."

Test Time

2008-10-14T19:55:00.006-05:00

Uggh... just had my mid-term in Narrative Strategies class and tomorrow my take-home test for History of Radio and TV is due. I did manage to swing by happy hour this evening, though.

Anyhow, thanks, you all, for all the insights and suggestions (yes, even the anonymous poster who called Obama a "Muslim")! Pls keep them coming! I'll post the poll tomorrow. Am hoping to have some time to seriously work on the screenplay this weekend. I've got the turning points down, but am stuck on how to start it. I mean, how do you show the start of a blog and make it interesting? And, what should be the catalyst/inciting incident (that gets the story underway)?

Who should play me?

2008-10-13T21:49:00.006-05:00

OK, so I had a poll up for a while on my other blog (it's still up on my MySpace page, in fact) about who should play me in "Queen of Sky" the movie. It was more of a joke than anything. The choices were:

Drew Barrymore
Myself
Queen Latifah
Eva Mendez
Katherine Heigl
Kate Hudson
Sandra Oh
Gwen Stefani
Beyonce
Jessica Alba

Now I'd like to get serious. My top picks are Katherine Heigl and Alicia Silverstone. Katherine is a big, curvy sag like me and Alicia's mom was a flight attendant for Pan Am (I read that on Wikipedia). My production company also mentioned people like Mischa Barton, Tori Spelling, Rachel Bilson and I don't remember who else right now.

I'm going to make a new poll, so suggestions, please! (And, NO, I'm not going to play myself!)

P.S. I forgot to mention that any actress who plays "Queen of Sky" needs to be quirky and slightly dysfunctional!

The First Order of Business

2008-10-10T20:41:00.005-05:00

Hello All,

The first order of business in the creation of this screenplay is to determine the structure. I was fortunate enough to get into a class called Narrative Strategies at U Texas this semester, which is all about the structure of film. I'm learning a lot in that class.

As many of you know, the most difficult part of starting any piece of writing is determining how and where to begin. (We're going to do this screenplay in the classical Hollywood style of the Three Act Structure, BTW.) I've been discussing this with my production company, Hiltz Squared, and we've come up with two options. At first I had structured it starting in the middle of the blog, but HS didn't like that so much. So, the choice now is:

A.) We start at the beginning of the blog, including the reasons for starting it and thereby raising the central question.

or

B.) We start at the end of the story, with "Queen of Sky" on a talk show discussing what happened to her. In this scenario, the whole movie is a flashback.

I personally think option A works better for a comedy, and also it will allow us to use the blog narration that HS and I have discussed.

What do you all think? And, what do you think the central question should be? (Ex. What happened to her? or Will this blog change her life? or Will Elena aka "Queen of Sky" ever get out of the airline industry?)

Feature Film Based on Quirky, Controversial Flight Attendant Blog in the Works

2008-10-10T20:36:00.001-05:00

**********FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE***********

Toronto, ON and Austin, TX, October 10, 2008—Hiltz Squared Media Group this week optioned the rights to former flight attendant Ellen Simonetti's semi-autobiographical novel, Diary of a Dysfunctional Flight Attendant: The Queen of Sky Blog. Hiltz Squared has commissioned Simonetti to write a screenplay based on the book. Simonetti, in turn, has launched an interactive blog—queenofscreen.com—about the writing of the screenplay, complete with scene snippets, plot outlines, and polls.

The working title of the screenplay is The Queen of Sky Blog, but Simonetti remains open to other title suggestions from the readers of her blog. The film will feature a Bridget Jones-esque international flight attendant whose colorful blog helps her navigate the ups and downs of her life and ultimately transforms her completely. Simonetti says she plans to make it a 90-minute comedy starring Katherine Heigl in the lead, with Kathy Griffin, Queen Latifah, Ricky Martin, Ellen DeGeneres, Bette Midler, Margaret Cho, and Nathan Lane as assorted flight attendant coworkers, and Richard Branson as a long-suffering frequent flier. Casting suggestions are welcome at queenofscreen.com.

Simonetti's book is based on her quirky, controversial, and similarly named blog, which led to her firing in 2004. However, 'Legacy Airlines,' the fictitious airline portrayed in the book and the screenplay, in no way represents any of Simonetti's previous employers.

Hiltz Squared Media Group Inc. is a film, television and new media production and distribution company located in Toronto, Canada. Formed in 2000, Hiltz Squared Media has grown into various aspects of the industry and continues to create new and original material for the ever-changing media and arts landscape. For more information visit www.hiltz2.com.

Ellen Simonetti is currently studying Radio/TV/Film at the University of Texas at Austin. For more information about Simonetti and her screenplay, Google her or visit queenofscreen.com (and leave a comment, please!)

Hiltz Squared is also exploring TV show ideas based on Simonetti's book.

Contacts:

Myles Shane

Vice President

Hiltz Squared Media Group, Inc.

Ellen Simonetti

www.queenofscreen.com

The Birth of a Screenplay

2008-10-08T23:58:00.005-05:00

Hello All,

This blog is going to be all about the writing of my screenplay, which is based on my semi-autobiographical book, Diary of a Dysfunctional Flight Attendant: The Queen of Sky Blog. I plan to include polls, plot outlines, scene snippets and plenty of other fun things here. Most of all, I'd like for you, dear reader, to participate in this project. I'm a first-time screenwriter, so I need all the help I can get!

Disclaimer: this blog will include some spoilers, but I'll try to keep Act 3 a secret. Also, if you give me feedback and/or suggestions, I can't guarantee that you will get credit for it in the film. But, of course, you'll receive my heartfelt gratitude and maybe even a ticket to the premiere! :-D